First 100 days

Dear Journal

Today my sons have been gone for 100 days. This exceeds the longest time we have been apart by 93 days ;-) I had planned to have a big extravagant party for my family and friends, first, to thank many of them for supporting me when I first started on this journey, and for caring for me along the way, and secondly, because I thought it would have been an awesome occasion to celebrate. Instead, I am probably going to spend the day in my pjs keeping a low profile and having a party for one.... which is fine because all day, nearly every day I think about my sons, and I feel close to them... somehow.

Anyway, I thought that I will put together what I have learnt in my first hundred days....

NOT EVERYONE 'GETS' IT

When I first started telling people (including a couple of my own immediate family) of this 100 day event - the reaction was surprising.... and one of the main reasons the party didn't go ahead.... The lesson I learnt from this is that not everyone is going to 'get' what it is like to be a missionary mama - UNTIL - the day they become one. I can't explain what it is like to be a mother, let alone a mother of children on the other side of the world... So it took me 100 days (I'm a slow learner ;-)) to realise that not even family 'get' it and that's okay. I have friends that do....

WHERE'S THE MONEY AT?

No one talks about it much - but having more than one missionary serving at a time is financially challenging. I currently work two jobs and yet it doesn't seem like enough. As a shopaholic by self-diagnosis - I don't go shopping at all anymore - not even for groceries unless absolutely necessary because I am afraid that there will be no money left for the boys. I was talking to Mr M the other day and said to him that I should have asked for clarification around my wedding vows for richer and for poorer - and asked - "poorer than what?" ;-) What I have learnt from this in 100 days is that - the blessings of being a missionary mama include money being available - always the exact amount from thin air - literally physically impossible - but always arriving exactly when it is needed - EVERY TIME - true story.

 

TENDER MERCIES

I am sure my life is littered with tender mercies - but I never knew.... well in these last 100 days - I know there are many that happen that I know about, and some I will never know learn of. Tender mercies include my previous example of money being given randomly that has just been enough to cover a shortfall, or the fact that our twin sons got to spend moments with each other at the MTC, or kind missionary mamas - closer to my sons, providing them with beanies, scarves - and much needed insect repellent. Tender mercies included his missionary mama, making contact with my son's companion's mother by fluke.... these things aren't coincidences - because this gospel is not one of co-incidences....“I testify that the tender mercies of the Lord are real and that they do not occur randomly or merely by coincidence. Often, the Lord’s timing of his tender mercies helps us to both discern and acknowledge them….The Lord’s tender mercies are the very personal and individualized blessings, strength, protection, assurances, guidance, loving-kindnesses, consolation, support, and spiritual gifts which we receive from and because of and through the Lord Jesus Christ….Faithfulness, obedience and humility invite tender mercies into our lives, and it is often the Lord’s timing that enables us to recognize and treasure these important blessings….I testify that the tender mercies of the Lord are available to all of us and that the Redeemer of Israel is eager to bestow such gifts upon us….Each of us can have eyes to see clearly and ears to hear distinctly the tender mercies of the Lord as they strengthen and assist us in these latter days"  Elder David A Bednar

 

WE HAVE RAISED GOOD MEN

When the children were born, there were complications which saw them being taken to intensive care without me seeing them. Instead when I came through general anaesthesia, I was shown two photos of my baby boys. Not knowing that I was having sons, when I was told, and the photos were brought to my eyes, I kissed each photo and vowed right then and there that I would do everything I could to raise stripling warriors.... and it turns out, and I have learnt in the last 100 days that I have raised wonderful good men - true stripling warriors. Their testimonies and experiences they are having and sharing are indescribable - they strengthen me, and I am blessed for it.

 

WHAT IT IS LIKE TO BE A MISSIONARY

I have two favourite quotes from my missionary son serving in the Santo Domingo West Mission that have taught me so much - one of which is about what it is like to be a missionary... "know that I'm on a mission so I'm going to be busy, I'm going to get sick, I may get hurt, I already have got lost before and many other things you wouldn't [want] to happen to me, but that's a mission". Aren't our missionaries awesome!!

 

MY TESTIMONY IS STRENGTHENED

Another gem of a quote from my son has strengthened my own testimony - "I'm a little sick.. which sucks but I don't care. I always tell myself whenever I feel bad, I'm in the DR. I wanted to come here so may as well make the most of it, btw, [I finished] Jesus the Christ finally! That's right all of it. My favourite quote I think it was in there: "you can destroy this body, but my spirit is indestructible" My spirit will keep growing. I grow closer to God than ever before, I learn more about His gospel. I will serve Him more. I will testify of Him more. I will become more like Him. So I'm [not] stressing about what can happen to this body of mine here, because my spirit will keep growing forever and ever and ever" - I know that's my 18 year old son there!! ;-) I love my missionary sons!!

 

So as the close of day 100 approaches - it may not have been celebrated like the way I had wanted - it is another day for me to reflect on my sons and the lives they are leading.... and I look forward to the next 100 days and the lessons that I will learn from them.... and who knows - I may get my party one of these 100 days ;-)!!

 

Happy 100 days - and only 630 days, 90 weeks and 21 Fast Sundays until I wrap them in my arms for a time before they head off into the next part of their lives....

 

Mxo

 

Tender Mercies

Dear Journal

I have recently come to consider the number of coincidences that occur in my life as a Missionary Mama - and realised, well I already knew this, but finally fully understood, that there are no such thing as coincidences, instead they are tender mercies being extended to us when we truly need them. And, believe me I needed some - and have been blessed accordingly.

Elder Bednar has taught "I testify that the tender mercies of the Lord are real and that they do not occur randomly or merely by coincidence. Often the Lord's timing of this tender mercies helps us to both discern and acknowledge them..... The Lord's tender mercies are the very personal and individualised blessings, strength, protection, assurances, guidance, loving-kindness, consolation, support, and spiritual gifts which we receive from and because of and through the Lord Jesus Christ. Truly the Lord suits 'his mercies according to the conditions of the children of men."

When the boys got their mission call, they had to report to the Missionary Training Centre (MTC) in the Dominican Republic (DR) - but as it turned out - there is nowhere in the Pacific for them to get visas into the DR, so their reporting MTC was changed to Provo, Utah. And with that news, Mission Get Together was born!!

 

The first thing I did was make contact with my cousin Vernon Heperi to arrange to pick the boys up. Now Vernon is a very important person at BYU Provo, and as his time is precious, I was unsure if he would be able to do this for me. As it turned out, he made himself available to pick my babies up. What was great is just the year before we had spent some time with Vernon, and early 2013 the boys spent time with his sons, and then later we visited again when Vernon came to NZ.  

 

With that confirmed, I asked that once the boys were picked up from the airport,  if Vernon would take the boys for a visit with my niece, their cousin, Sister Niyah Garisau who has been serving a mission in the Salt Lake Temple Square Mission since September 2013. He said he would be able to do that and asked me to contact Sister Garisau's Mission President, of which I did.

 

Now the co-incidences don't stop there. You see, Sister Garisau had a change in Mission Presidents (MP), so I was a little nervous to ask her new one, as he would only be new and this visit may have been something that would not be approved. However, as it turned out, when I rang the MP's office, Sister Garisau's former MP was still serving and training the new MP, and because he knew Sister Garisau well, he allowed the visit, and a release to go to dinner and spend time on Temple Square. What a blessing, that a MP would know Sister Garisau well enough to know how important this visit was.

 

I spoke to Vernon the afternoon the boys were to arrive and let him know about Sister Garisau's schedule and the meeting point... After losing my patience (Vernon had promised to call) I called Vernon and I got to talk to my sons! Elder Dimitri Turketo reminded me quickly that he would talk to me in May (Mother's Day) and was wanting to keep the Mission Rules and hang up the phone ;-) What a good boy!! Luckily my other son and Sister Garisau wanted to talk ;-) Not only had my babies made it safely through San Francisco to Salt Lake in one piece - but they were having dinner with Sister Garisau!! Vernon had taken them to the Roof Restaurant in the Joseph Smith Memorial Building - which I love!! If the boys went to the DR MTC - this would never have happened....what a blessing!!

 

Finally, Vernon took the boys after their visit with Sister Garisau to check into the MTC. He emailed me photos and a short video clip of them checking in. He did that for me and I will be so grateful to him for that! He knew I was worried and missing my sons, so he stayed with them as far as I would have been allowed.... Receiving the video clip and photos made this MM's day!!

 

I know that God is in control, and thank Him for extending His tender mercies to this sookylala of a MM through the change in reporting MTC, Vernon being available to pick the boys up, and care for them, and Sister Garisau's MP approving her visit with her cousins. What a wonderful event this was for both sides of the veil!

 

President Thomas S Monson has said: there is a guiding hand above all things. Often when things happen, it's not by accident. One day, when we look back at the seeming coincidences of our lives, we will realise that perhaps they weren't so coincidental after all. The Lord knows [our] trials. He knows our victories, And if [we] trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.... he shall direct thy paths"

 

What tender mercies have you found in your life?

 

Mxo